Once there was a very uncomfortable man so he went to the doctor to find out what his problem was. “What are the symptoms?” the doctor asked.
“My eyes bug out and my ears are ringing.”
So the doctor examined him carefully, drew blood and announced, “Your tonsils need to come out,” and so they did, but the problem persisted. The poor man went to see another doctor.
“You poor man! Clearly your teeth are the issue,” so the he went to the dentist and had all his teeth pulled out. Alas, the problem continued so he called in a specialist who gently told him, “I’m sorry but you only have six months to live.”
Shocked, the man decided to live life to the fullest. He traveled around the world spending his life savings. Finally, after five months of extravagant living, the man went to a tailor to be fitted for the suit he would be buried in.
The tailor announced, “34 inch sleeve. 16 inch neck.”
“That can’t be right,” the man objected. “I wear a 15 inch collar.”
“Well,” the little tailor said, “if you wear a 15 inch collar, your eyes will bug out and your ears will ring.”
Why do we try to make things so complicated? We buy computers that could run the space program when all we really want to do is check our email or balance a bank statement. We buy cell phones with features we will never use to impress people we don’t really like and have you looked at baby strollers lately? There is a place for your latte (and a cup-holder for junior’s), a place to plug in your iPhone, stow the baby bag (and all the gadgets that come with that), sunshades, air bags, air conditioning and a place to put the baby complete with enough straps and snaps to ensure you will never get anywhere on time.
Church can be the same way. We can become so concerned about the fine points of theology, the nuances of grammar, the implications of archaeology and the opinion of everyone else that we forget what it’s really all about.
Why does it have to be so complicated? I just want to be a Christian! So let’s put down the laptop, turn off the cell phone, unplug the iPhone and take a deep breath. Didn’t that feel good? Go ahead – take another. Now sit quietly for a moment and smile.